Rant.

Good afternoon.

Planned on sitting in front of the computer all day again. Very windy; although it'd be better if it was cloudy. One month and five days until my birthday. Wonder how it will go.... Aish, I'm almost broke from my Christmas and CNY money... which I haven't gotten the chance to use on myself. I wanted to save up to get a camera (those professional nikon or canon ones; and yes I know, I have two digicam but they're different). I dont think technology likes me. My ipod is broken because ANY earphone I use, you could only listen on one side of the earphone. My parents asked if I wanted a new one but I said no just to save money since it still works (even though it's only one side). Unlike others out there who buy every freakin generation ipod when it's not even freaking broken. My laptop on the other hand... the batteries died, it overheats, and its full of junk. I was asked if I wanted another one but hey... if it works, I can live with it, even though it might piss me off.

Actually, I haven't "blogged" for a while. I have a xanga that I don't use and the last entry in that xanga was about my horrible 14th birthday. Even though I have many birthdays that didn't go the way I wanted to, I shouldn't complain because I was surrounded by friends and families and some people don't get that, so I'm really thankful.

My goal before 2010 is to lose weight, this time I'm serious. I know I said that last year but I'm really going to do it before 2010... I hope. Spring break, I'm trying to get a few of us to go to SantaMonica to run toward Malibu. I shouldn't plan ahead because whenever I plan something out, it never goes the way I wanted. Someone ends up changing plan and then another one decides not to go and another person says something else. Why doesn't this happen to other people when they plan stuff out? Aish, I hate it. Whatever.

I want to buy so many things online... but thing is I'm not allowed to. CDs, clothes, dramas, tickets, etc. And the thing is, those are the ones you can't find here in California... or maybe in the US at all! Oh well, there's always the future -_-;

Anyway, 2009 is not a good year for many people. Like me, for example. Since the beginning of January 2009, I've been crying at least once a week... literally. Every week until now. If it's not school, it's family. If its not family, it's friends. If its not friends, it's a movie. If it's not a movie its something else. I dont know. Many people come to me for advice and I feel the advice I give them aren't so bad. I'm happy it motivates them but it doesnt seem to motivate myself. I need someone else to listen and understand and give me advice.

It's hard to find someone who REALLY understands what you're going through. Many people just ASSUME and say, "Oh it's okay. I know how you feel. They're wrong, just ignore them." I'm sorry to say... what kind of crap is that? I know you're trying to help and I know I should be happy but honestly, it just pisses me off. First of all, it's not okay. Second of all, how the hell would you know THEY're wrong? I'd rather hear bitter truths than lies that will make me feel better. I rarely go to anyone for advice or help. If you feel like I open up to you, sorry to say, I'm just ranting. Because theres only ONE person I open up to.

This isnt really a "blog." It's starting to be more of a ranting thing.

Another thing that bothers me. Nosy people. When I'm talking to someone or having a conversation and something just happens to make your ears stand up, and you happen to be listening and it doesn't involve you, JUST ACT LIKE YOU DIDNT HEAR IT. Stop asking, "What happened?" or "What are you guys talking about?" It seriously ticks me off. Can you just PLEASE mind your own business? I mean, I don't mind if its once in a while but having to ask every single time... aish~~!!

You know what? I'm just going to stop here.