2010, not the end.

Class of 2010 we are done. Now get out there and have some fun! Don't forget to strive for success. Just remember you're the best. Oh, also don't forget to smile. Make this summer worth while. This is from a girl oh so silly. Going by the name Bully--I mean Lily

Sigh.. today's graduation had it's downs and one of them was not really leaving. Kind of disappointed I can't really say I literally "walked the stage" because... we didn't. It was pretty unorganized. I don't know if it's due to the whole economy thing but... our decorations were not enough. What ever happened to banners, a balloon "bridge" or the "2010" balloon? Also, they should've brought us up on the stage and have us go up one by one with a gap between each person. This one was on the grass with the photographer and staff blocking the aisle for the crowd to take a picture of us. It was so crowded between the people shaking hands with the principal and the first row. And it would've been better if one person was walking the stage accepting the diploma and shaking the principal's hand--even though that's a bit time consuming but hey, it's OUR day.

After the graduation I went to pick up my diploma along with the other seniors. We had to exit a different direction and our parents had to "pick us up" at the OTHER side which was a very troublesome... process? I couldn't find my family, who had my camera, and people were leaving. I got pictures with some people from their camera but I was hoping I would get pictures with them with my camera but unfortunately I was late. I couldn't find Mrs. Kennedy or Mr. Zapata by the time I got my camera. I got a picture with Mr. Brewer, Mr. Martinez, Mr. Escobar, and Mr. Yom. My cousin, the photographer for the day, was dragged around (by me, heh) to take pictures. The caps were so annoying--even with the bobby pins. During the pictures I had to keep adjusting it. After taking pictures, we walked all the way to the parking lot and headed out for dinner. I kind of felt bad because some people wanted to "take me out for dinner" and my dad ended up paying and it was quite pricey. At that same place, I ran into Michael, Felix, Danny, Finny, and some other people. Anyway... yeah :\

And I'm sorry if it seemed like I left first. I was actually there for a long time. I was just wandering around the whole universe looking for my parents. I was bombarded with phone calls and texts asking where I was. I went crazy and wanted to scream. After what seemed about 20 minutes of finding my dad, it turns out he didn't have my camera and my cousin did. So he went back to fetch them. While he went to look for my family he had me wait in one area where I took pictures with some people and saw people I haven't seen for a while. By the time my dad came with the camera, everyone was gone :(

Anyway, we've made it this far. I thought I was going to shed a few tears because when I heard the graduation song during the voice ceremony, I fought back tears. I don't know. Maybe it's because it doesn't feel real. And don't think of this as a 'good bye.' It's simply a "I need a rest from your face. I'll see you later." Hah! Kidding! But yes, we will meet over the summer and definitely go karaoke-ing again! I had a blast that day. We'll go back and leave around 5 so I can confirm if karaoke boy works there, hah!

Summer

So summer started and technically I'm still a high school student since I haven't graduated. I will... this Thursday. So on Monday, I hung out with my close friends. I was making graduation "gifts" and I had two left to make before leaving to meet up with the group. I thought I wouldn't finish because there was an hour left and I couldn't finish in time. I remembered Dm telling me that N wasn't going to come so I thought I might have more time to finish Da's and Jo's. I did... but turns out N came and I felt bad not bringing/making hers. I originally planned to wrap it in tissue paper and write notes for them and give it to them on graduation but we can't carry anything during graduation and I thought it might be easier to give it to them early. Anyway, I thought I was late because I arrived around 11:40 or so. When walking into the plaza, Jenny was walking the opposite direction so we both walked to the restaurant which was pretty empty. We then went to the market and then bookstore. Then we were called to meet at the restaurant. When we went back, it was packed and we had to wait; we had no idea we had to sign in. After eating, we took some pictures then went to the arcade. Taiko, DDR, and pool. After that, we went to karaoke--which was pretty fun despite the fact that they didn't have the updated japanese/korean songs I wanted. When we went to pay, I didn't want to bother with the math (just like back at the restaurant). Thank goodness I was with calculus people, hah! Or... people who can divide correctly, haha. So while I was standing there--after contributing my money--a guy walks in. But since we (a group of 8 plus Dn's brother) were kind of blocking the entrance, the guy was waiting for us to finish. He was *_* and he looked like this one ulzzang... whose name I cannot remember. So I kept staring at him and he caught me. Our eyes met for three seconds then my friends finish paying and we leave. Inside I was screaming, "Nooo! Why couldn't we have left a minute later?" Well, we could have if we all joined Dn's brother in singing ABC (how cute is that kid?!). After the group left, I stayed back to wait for my dad. I went back into the arcade to find Jerry playing DDR. I joined him after he rested with his friends. When it was my time to leave, I went downstairs and passed the pizza booth where this guy had his back turned. From the back, he looked like karaoke boy. Anywayyyy, I would say that was a good day. I ordered rice at a ramen place, hah! Had lots of laughs at karaoke and on our way to the arcade.

Last Day

It is the last day of school but it doesn't feel like it. Today was the award ceremony, the one that was postponed due to the incident that happened at school last week. To think I should have been happy I got an award. I'm happy and proud of my fellow students and friends earning their medals, scholarships, and whatnot. But I felt bad and was worried. Worried that my brother, dad, and mom wouldn't think the medal I got was enough. Seeing the same person go up over and over. I was worried my family would ask, "How come you didn't get that? Didn't you apply for that too?" These two years, ever since I started taking AP classes, that's when I pulled myself together to try hard. But it wasn't hard enough. I wish I had an older silbing who pushed me, who scared me about college, college apps and everything. It wasn't until I filled out my college application when I was scared. I noticed even though I did community service, it wasn't enough. Even though I was on the principle's honor roll, it wasn't enough. Even though I took AP classes, it wasn't enough. Even though I tried to stay up late to study, it wasn't enough. NOTHING WAS ENOUGH. I knew my brother was insensitive. I knew he was going to be his arrogant self and make comments. I knew he was going to say, "Thats all? Just one medal for 3.5? That's so easy." But for someone who's only a freshman, who spends all his time on the computer and hasn't taken any AP classes or done community service, what does he know? I wanted to be that older sibling that helps him so he won't feel as little as I did around my friends and classmates. But I don't know how I could if he's so... I dont even know the word to describe him.

Graduation is on the 24th and I don't know if I'm ready. I just hope I am.

Sweats and blood, nothing is good enough.

Collapsing and gasping, you can't be tough.

Striving ahead, they're pulling you down.

You're getting nowhere, just going round and round.

Screams telling you to go back home.

Shouts reminding you you're alone.

Pull yourself together, it's your life.

Their words can't hurt you, so continue to fight.

Concert

(omg... I look so disgusting standing next to the girls. The one time I should've worn all black like I usually do -_-) I woke up this morning SORE. My whole body. Yesterday was the WG World Tour guest starring 2PM. At first, I was very upset because I bought the VIP ticket for $170 and was told that it consists of a meet and greet, a picture, an autograph, and a tour gift. All I got was one picture. They rushed us--one picture and we had to keep moving. I couldn't talk to them or ask them questions. BS. My friends who got the tickets for $7 got the concert, picture of one of the member when he was standing outside by himself, and autographs from the girls when they were walking toward their car. Anyway...

VIPs were told the meeting will take place around 5PM. After school, I went home to put my backpack away and grab my poster, ticket, glow sticks, and whatnot. Took a while to get to the House of Blues because of the traffic. Once I got out the car, a guy on a phone walked right passed me. I shut the door and stared at him thinking, "Pretty face. Make up. Familiar looking. Omg, is he from 2PM?" To be honest, I couldn't match the member's name and faces. I knew the members name. I knew their faces. I didn't know who was who except Taec and Nick. Anyway, so I just stood there and continued to watch him walking. My parents rolled down the window and asked, "Why are you still standing there? Aren't you going to get in line?" I pulled out my camera, pen, and notepad and pointed the the guy. "I think he's from the group!" I said. "Just go. I'll get in line later," I told my parents. When they drove off, I walked to House of Blues. I wasn't sure if it was the back entrance or the front entrance--I'm going to say it's the back because we all entered by the parking lot, which was down the hill. I stood by the back entrance because that's where the "guy" walked into. I saw two girls about to cross the street with me, I so I asked, "Isn't he a member?" and they said "Yes,__" and his name, which I didn't quite get. So for a while, I was the only one standing there taking a picture of him. He was standing on the porch talking on the phone. The fans were down the hill waiting in line and they didn't know he was standing on the porch. It was just me and Junsu a few . Then Myrna and Cathy arrived. Myrna was holding a bag of Sour Patch because she knew it was Junsu's favorite. I pointed to his direction because they didn't notice he was standing there. When they saw, they fangirled--but quietly. I told Myrna to take out the bag of candy and wave it for him to come get it. When I was holding the candy, I waved it back and forth and he saw. He knew he wanted to come get it. He smiled at us teasing him. I guess it was kind of pay back because he then walked over to us and I pulled the top of my pen out to get ready in case he came over to get the candy. Instead, he stopped about five feet away from us to continue talking on his phone. TEASE! He could've stood on the porch and talked on the phone but no, he crossed that mini bridge toward us and stopped a few feet away. "You're such a tease!" I said to him. He smiled to himself then walked back. I guess he was calling Oneway's Chance because Chance then arrived in a hummer in front of us. To be honest, I didn't even know who Chance was. I just kept staring at him sitting in the hummer waiting for Junsu. When Junsu came out, he was trying to unlock the gate of the entrance so I tried to help--and failed. When his manager or some staff got it unlocked, he walked passed us and Myrna handed him the candy. I wanted to ask him to sign but he was holding a soda can in each hand and I thought he wouldn't be able to. I wanted to hurt myself because I wasn't brave enough to ask him to sign that whole 20 minute I was with him--without any screaming group of fans. Instead, I stood there like an idiot. But like Maggie said, I was being considerate because he was on the phone.

After he left, I walked to the line with a new friend, Da Eun. She was also with Myrna, Cathy, and I when we were standing there waiting for Junsu to come get the candy. We stood in line with Antoinette, another friend I met a few months ago at a concert. We stood in line from four to six-ish. We got hungry so Toni (antoinette) went to buy some fries. We continued to wait and wait and talk to the girls in front of us--who became our new friends. I'm sorry, but I forgot their names. I remember one was Winnie because we exchanged emails. So I told Da Eun, Toni, and the three girls when we get to the meet and greet, pretend we don't know each other because if they find out we are in a group, they will only take one picture per group. So after I took the picture with the girls, I walked over to the guys. They were wild and loud; shouting and laughing. I had two cameras (just in case I ran out of batteries, which I did.) I wanted to use one to record and one to take pictures. But i was afraid of holding the other camera for recording because of the security, so I stuffed it in my bag. I regret it because the other girls did. I should've just kept it on and recoridng while it was in my bag so it would've caught the short conversation I had. Well, it was hardly a convo at all. When it was my turn for the picture, the guys greeted me with a "Hey!!!!" Then Taecyeon asked me, "Hey, how are you?" and I replied, "I'm good!" while handing the camera to the lady. Junsu, who I hoped would remember me from earlier--standing there waving the candy, said, "You good?" and I nodded and he raised his hand for a high five. After the picture, we went back outside to the VIP line to wait for the other people to finish with their meet and greet. While in line, some girls squealed and shouted "Taecyeon!!" Everyone looked up at the second floor because apparnetly, he was on his phone there. I missed him by a second. It seemed like Taec was taking a selca (self cam) of him and the crowd down below; he uploaded the picture on twitter and I saw myself on the corner. Anyway, when the concert started, I went deaf. I was literally standing right next to the speaker--and you know at concerts, the speakers are on full blast? I had no idea the speaker was right there. I could feel my whole body going "BOOM BOOM BOOM" and I felt the vibration throughout the body. School Gyrlz came out to perform and the crowd was pretty quiet. Once 2PM came out, everyone screamed. I waved my poster and glowstick in the air like an idiot. Keke, Junsu saw my glow stick and poster (it was the only one with light up flashing star) and came over. Then Taec came over. Nick, Taec, and I forgot who, were dancing sexily close to each other--FANSERVICE ANYONE-- and they were just making the crowd go crazy. After that, it was the Wonder girls turn. My god, they're so thin. Sunye's voice is so angelic. Lim, the "new" girl that filled in for Sunmi (who left the group so she can go to school), was sweet. A lot of people hated her because she wasn't as pretty and they didnt like her replacing Sunmi but I hope after the concert, they start to like her. I kind of liked her since the beginning but after the concert, I liked her even more. They performed together and solo. I remember Yubin performing "Boom Boom Pow," Sohee performing "Single Ladies," Lim performing "Lipgloss," and Sunye performing "Paparazzi." I don't remember what YeEun performed. Well, I don't know the name. I love Lim's intro for her solo. She came out introducing and talking about Sunye, Sohee, Yubin, and YeEun. "-- is the go-getter. --is sweet and talented and smart--" etc. Then it was her turn. "Now let me ask you. What chu know about me?" The crowd was thinking, I guess. Then she repeated "What chu know about me?" with attitude. Then the crowd knew where she was going. That's when the music for "Lipgloss" came on.

When the concert ended I stood by the bar with Da Eun. Then I spotted Toni standing with Rosie in the back. We talked and then Jennifer (writer from allkpop) came up to Rosie but she didn't notice me so I said hi to her and we hugged. After that, Da Eun, Toni, and I went outside where we bumped into Myrna and Cathy. We planned on waiting to see WG and 2PM come out. I told my dad the concert was going to end around 10. Then I called him and told him I'm not exactly sure when it finishes so he should wait until I call him. Instead, he arrived around 10 and that's when I was hanging out with Toni, Da Eun, Myrna, and Cathy--waiting for WG/2PM. I reminded him, "Aw, you're here alraedy? I told you I was going to call you. But yeah, the concert just finished." and he asked, "Then what are you doing?" And I told him I was waiting with my friends for the celebs to come out and he said, "Okay then. I'll give you a few more minutes, I'll wait." Then hung up. We were hanging at the front entrance. I suggested we go to the back entrance where we saw Junsu hanging out earlier and they thought 2pm wasn't going to come out from there so we continued waiting. We decided to break--half of us to the front and half of us at the back. Me and Cathy waited while Myrna, Toni, and Da Eun went to the back where we first saw Junsu. -_-; I suggested we go there first but they went there and had me wait in the front. Myrna then called Cathy and Cathy was like, "Let's walk. Hurry." So i followed her and it turned out that Myrna at the time was taking a picture and getting autograph with Chance who drove off in his limo. "I told you so! They're gonna come out from here!" I said. So we waited and then the boys eventually come out. Their manager/staff had securities block us. I held out my pen and notebook but they kept their head down and walked very fast to the van. -_-; I sohuld've had BOTH my notebook AND camera out to record. FML. After that, I saw my dad waiting for me (he caught me being a fangirl LOL) then we walked about two blocks to the car. About 30 minutes after I left, the girls came out and Myrna got Sunye's and YeEun's autograph. RAWRRR.

Okay, this is probably the longest entry I've ever written.

ASDFGH

RAWR. So I wrote a few sentences and I accidentally hit 'backspace.' Sigh. I wrote about how I'm in psychology first period at the moment and that I am annoyed, tired, and blah. Yes, I don't know how "blah" became and emotion but that's how I feel at the moment. I want to look forward to this week and the next because yearbook will be coming out. The next day there will be award ceremonies for senior. One at school and one at YUCA. The day after that there's the concert @ House of Blues. I really hope things work out but with my luck... pfft. I should be looking things up for my psychology project but I feel like my brain is going to explode!!!!

Fire drill soon.