2009 Not My Year

Like I said, I might be some kind of maniac but I've cried at least once or twice a week (or more) ever since the last week of December 08 until now. Every week, literally. I told myself it's no big deal, others been through worse but after what had happened last week... I wont be able to enjoy a great 2009 (rest in paradise<3).

Today I was at a pre-funeral thing where we sat with monks and prayed. I couldnt bring myself to look at the picture frame because I was already trying so hard to fight back the tears. I've never lost anyone so close to me before. We sat there for about two hours or so and the whole time I tried to think of something that would make me hold the tears off until I get home. I couldnt help it. I had to go to the restroom and let it all out before returning. While sitting, memories of her ran through my head and I couldnt stop crying.

Oh damn... I'm crying again...

I think I'll stop blogging and watch Friends to cheer me up a bit.

This birthday I just want to stay home and stay in bed. But since it's a Monday, I'm going to have a lot of homework to do...



2010, please help me out.