For You, Ivy

<3 thank you. Thanks for being here for me. Thank you for being the person I can go to, for lending me your shoulders, for making me laugh when I thought I couldn't smile, for being you.

"I understand how you feel about being blocked out. I don't know if your friends or my friends do it on purpose or not but it really hurts. It makes you feel so alone, even when you try to speak up, they don't listen.... I guess that's why I like to hang out with just one or two people. It's not because I want the attention the entire time, and I'm pretty sure you don't either, it's because I rarely even get the attention. I'll be talking to them about something and someone else would speak up, cutting off what I was saying, and the person that was listening to me talk forgot about everything I said and listened to the other person. I don't know if it's my problem with speaking or what I say is never interesting enough to keep their attention."

I knew you'd understand. I can finally listen to the song on your blog (because im on my dad's laptop) and it's really good.

- * -

Ok, so tomorrow the family REALLY decided not to celebrate. Most people are going to wedding, others have work, and eh. I will give up this year as it never happened. I thought the first month of 09 was horrible and I thought, "Eh, its only the beginning." But no, theres something every week that ruins the week/month. It's okay, right? There's still 2010. That is, if it's willing to be on my side.

Tomorrow I just want to go to the beach or something. Walk around and feel the calm and fresh breeze. If not, maybe find a few people and go to Little Tokyo karaoke.